Wednesday, November 26, 2008

I Want My Time Back (pt. 2)

Part Two of a series that will continue as long as people are dumb.

The CRITERIA:

The device or person in question has to fill all these requirements to be considered a total waste of my time.

1. Posted on at least 3 blogs in my feed.
2. Adds nothing to humanity in terms of knowledge or culture.
3. Does nothing even remotely useful.
Bonus Points: Excessive or inappropriate use of technology.

I'd like to extend this award to everyone who's come up with a [insert material here]iPhone stand, and published instructions. Possibly excluding the first person, because at least when he did it, he could call it original.

These devices hold up your iPhone, using some material. So far k'nex, cardboard, the phone's packaging, and money have all been used. Apparently, this is a novel idea for just about everyone, and so 1/5 of all new iPhone owners feel the need to tell us all how they made a sweet stand. A 5 year old could do this with only the barest of instructions. But, if you absolutely, positively need detailed instructions, make, lifehacker and instructables can help you out: there are 18 different sets of instructions for stands/docks on instructables alone.

Undoubtedly someone will call me out, saying that a stand is useful, and thus doesn't fulfill requirement #3. Sure, the stand is useful. The instructions on the other hand, are roughly on par with writing, "Please, for the love of god, don't smack yourself really hard in the face with this!" on a hammer. If they can't figure it out on their own, then they likely won't be able to read the instructions.

Sadly, none of these qualify for the excessive or inappropriate use of technology bonus points.

I'm not linking to these things. If you really want to see it you can google it. But I'm warning you: you'll want your time back.

5 comments:

solipsistnation said...

But a stand for your electronic device is VITAL. Otherwise it might rest upon the filthy filthy table and be SULLIED by it.

inchblog said...
This comment has been removed by the author.
inchblog said...

I agree. Thay should all stop wasting their time producing these things which can't fold up and won't last more than a few minutes. They should all buy BatRests from http://www.seskimo.com.

Mightysinetheta said...

One of the few things dumber than posting instructions on how to make an iPhone stand is buying an iPhone stand.

That said, clever concept.

inchblog said...

Excellent concept.